CoCK BLoCK

It’s too long
No one is going to like it
Go to sleep, go to sleep
Go to sleep little audience.
You think anyone really wants to
see
hear
feel it?
You think anyone really wants?


I want’s
Call me Sir Wants-a-lot
of motivation
Something- kryptonite
I write
for the haters that’s what
Why I gotta
Wanna
Gonna do what I do
It’s for the haters
Doubting my ability
like a codependent
already seeing me
fall.
Ready to catch me
stand me
on my own
two feet
planted before me
I fall again into the cycle
Call me recycled.
Yes I am
a catch
not for your traps
or webs of issues
not about me
helping not about me.
Helping me out
not picking up
another habit
not making you a habit.


Really,
you think you’re going to finish
It’s all the smoke
Smoking mirrors
Slows you down
brings you in
recoil into you
Like you do on that stoners couch
Ouch!
Holy water, scents of sage
It’s for the haters
I hear you now
and I feel you later
Hater

And you think
the community
The politics
All sounds
like tricks to me
And you!
THINK
fast
here is a firework
“PoP” in the sky
crackles in my eye
IMPUNITY
Preachy Preach
Who will see it
It’s too long
You really think you belong
in the conversation?

My response
Breathrelax
Chant
camouflage
the haters
Each piece of me
I reveal
Rebel with a pen
plain rebel
Revel in the exposition
Exhibition
Like “Art in the Street”
here is my art
Read this shit
Will compose till
I’m a ruca rocking it
Till my wheels
In my head
pop off.
Doing it for the haters
The Greek Chorus
In my mind
Of my nightmares
Dragging on like that
Clingier than pollen
Germinating
Germs.
Gonna grind you out
Make you fainter with time
Grind out each line
drown OUT
sound OUT
shout OUT
To the H-A-T-E-R-S

Tetris

There once was a big hole
a whole lot
of emptiness.
Right there
You see it?
Of course not
Cause there is nothing there!
Not sure if it’s void
of hope though.
But then it wouldn’t be empty
it would be hope full.
There are moments
when I feel full.

You fool!
Me!
See
those moments
that I strive
for
I want more.
Breathing,
POSTURE
foot strike
Strides
Usain Bolt-like
towards my life.

He’s a part
of my Tetris
Art,
my boy
WRITING
my cAts
my kId
my kIts
my boIs
some kicks.
Him
Work
Love
play
Pray to Huehues
that they stay
these moments
Live them
9 to 5
not living for a 9 to 5
don’t want it
don’t don’t
don’t want it .

He’s my student
one more I want to reach
I teach
preach
perched up there in front.
Their future I want to keep in front
of me their
future
shape
well rounded.

There once was a big hole
a whole lot
of emptiness.
Then my fairy-butch mother
then another and another
told me
showed me
there are possibilities
RUNNING rivers down
Me a mountain
Of ideas
Merging
to the… see.

Playing to my strengths
I gotta keep it right
nothing left
must accept the truth.
I make you question
that’s the truth.
Knowledge worker
massaging those thoughts
feeding off the thoughts
VULTURE!
Thoughts
you disseminate
deeper than
your status
they pollinate
my insides
damn you
you Dandelion
shaking me up like that.
Knowledge working
It’s working
this teaching thing for me.
There is more I want to
Orchestrate
Now hear this
Maestro!
Maestra
Mr. Prof.
not Dr.
Don’t doctor me
I don’t doctor myself
Cause I’ve wasted too, many days
feeling wasted
rusting with resentment
bitterness burning my tripas
like Patron

I am a Patron.
Master of my work.
Work for him
nurture him
little plant
GROW.
I’ll feed you with stories
Fertilize with Encouragement
you to create
play with you in the sun.
You create a beauty
I admire
learn from the colors
you magnify.
Smile for me little one
just
Smile.

Confession...

There are those times when feelings are so disorienting, feelings that intimacy like a skeleton key manages to set free. Sometimes they are intense feelings that have nothing to do with what just happened. It happened to... And sometimes it happened during their heavy playing, emotions that had no business being there surfaced all uninvited. Well sort of, they say don’t hate the player hate the game but with BDSM, it was a game of “dropping my guard for you. I am going to fall back and I know you will catch me, in your web of leather strokes and skin-melting-hot- metals. I will be vulnerable with you, to save my vulnerability, be able to trust again. Catch me please.” BDSM, like ALL relationships, is a tough game. It’s easier saying you’re going to let go then actually doing it. It’s not always our choice either to lose it, and BDSM creates that illusion; CONTROL give it and take it. Consent. Bringing down my walls conceptually. But our heart, our mighty mind collide, like all great forces they clash, shifts those faults- were our roots lie and how does one cover up when we are literally naked, sprawled out before another.

Amigas eroticas (or What the Cameras Didn't Capture)

It started when I saw you naked in the hotel bathroom,
I heard the water drop with urgency
anxious to glisten against your backside.
I walked towards you
to hand you your razor, as you nicely asked.
I approached the bathroom
wondering if the Grizzlies were capable of finding
that underdog fire inside them to beat
the San Antonio Spurs- at least one game.
You parted the curtain,
bent over, reached out for the razor with your left hand
perched your right one on the edge of the tub
while the water smacked off your ass
your hard nipples
waved hypnotically before me.
As the razor flowed from my hand to the floor
I imagined myself walking into the tub,
lifting you so you could hold onto the towel rack
that hung from the ceiling
placing your thighs on my shoulders
and you Cobraing your legs around my neck.
My breath constricted
I forced my tongue through your thighs
Buried it hot and deep inside your chocha,
drinking you como agua de coco right out of its shell
You tasting sweet
And being so wet, I could hear the ocean in your moans.
You begging "Please,
stop
I can't cum anymore,"
I try to stop myself
pull my face away from your pussy
but my lips…
my lips are too, locked
In a French kiss with your clit.
I blinked after 3 seconds and there you were
Still reaching out
For your razor.
I walked away, my pussy lips ruffled with excitement
And tried to concentrate on the sweaty men on TV.

Later that night we exchanged kisses, big ones
small ones, some loose others more involved
as my erection- cause women get hard too
swelled between my legs.
You slipped into your dreams
while wetness collected between my thighs.

The next day we talked and laughed
sometimes even held hands like sweethearts
dodged countless joggers while
languages from all over the world
buzzed and chirped about us.
Soon my longing for you got hotter n' stickier
than the D.C. humidity.

No expectations but overflowing
With anticipation I treaded through the hours

Then I saw you-
walking towards me
Dressed in black from head to toe
your nails the color of fire,
lips dark as plums,
your back bare and lickable
and feet strapped to those 3 inch leather hills,
and my pussy flowed like a cascada.
Right then and there I knew those heals would be digging into my back
later that night
along with U setting my "pent up energy free" con tus dedos
your piercing rubbing against my clit
imprinting your ganas on my arms, back and ass
I'd have your scent under my nails spread across my lips
And I'd finally get to braid my nakedness with yours.

(Image: Anna P. Sutton "I Surrender:)

My Motivation

Stroke
Strokes
across the tight smooth
canvass
vast
strokes
fine strokes
pelitos on her belly fine.
Strokes thick
like thumbs
pressed
pressing windpipe.

Strokes
I don’t get I give to myself.
Strokes I can’t get
I give to myself.

If I were
your Master would
you would do
what I’d say?
I’d say
write me sonnets
paint me views
meant only for a blind woman
help me see
make me savor
cook me
meals with your
sauce
sauciness
satire.

Stroke
me
my ego
there you go
like that
you like that
self confidence in me
ego
let go my Ego
roam free it go
fast it go zoom
sweep you off your
feet.
Please don’t jump
over
my broom.
That’s crossing the line.
Be like me
like me
I don’t like
too, much.
Serial
Seriousness
No more
I’m serious. Not marathon
Mono-gamer anymore
I’m serious.

Each day I am faced by my values
the things I like appear
in so many shapes and sizes.
They are so scattered- wanna connect the dots
hand gliding across
from one dot value
to the other. Valuable
information revealed
I see the picture clear.

See her
My Motivation
Lose myself in her
my labyrinth
has me turning corners
doing tricks
to reach her center
where I feel showered
on fire
in light.

The room spins
my breath
feels like a fur ball
hurts my chest.
You make me forget
simple things
like an exhale.
You remind me
that yes I can.
Have it all
Each day
each time with you
is a déjà vu?
Nah, you’re just my dream
coming true.
My Motivation.

Mi Mujer

Mi mujer


Al mirar en sus ojos
color cajeta
me pierdo en mi imaginación,
veo su corazón latiendo
por mi
fuerte como el palpite del mío
chocando contra mi pecho.

Sus labios son finos y suaves
Como bombones
Al tocarlos con los míos
Se desbaratan como burbujas
es la sensación
que me dan sus besos
burbujeos
en mis labios
mi cuerpo se llene de emoción

Su belleza de mujer domina
todo mis sueños.
Dominante
Dominatrix
su belleza es un don
la veo por las noches
su figura consume
mis pensamientos todo el día.
Belleza omnipresente
por dentro, por fuera
consumo de lo que me muestra.

Me consume el deseo
de tocar su cuerpo
rozar su piel canela
como la de la Malinche
deseo pecaminoso
causa rechazo.
Pero así lo dijo el destino
Y estiro su rizos
suaves y sedosos, los atrapo
entre mis dientes y los estiro
sus rizos fragantes a coco,
me invitan a que entierre
mi cara en ellos.
Me hacen cosquillas en las nariz
como el olor de aquellos churros
con canela que saboreábamos
cada domingo después de misa.

Me acaricia
sus manos
aprietan mis pechos
como preparando masa
para tamales
la acurruco entre mi pecho
susurro en su oído
“Mámame”
siento su boca caliente, pegajosa
resbalosa, resbalando su lengua
sobre mi pezón
se acerca a mi
su boca roza mi boca
“hazme el amor” me pide.
Le doy
un besito seguido por otro
mas largo y profundo
nuestro lenguas bailando
al ritmo, palabras y ternura
de Juan Gabriel.
Pensamientos
Volviéndose en actos
En hechos
Haciendo cosas de enamorados.

Besos y caricias interrumpidas
Por te quieros
le echan leña a nuestro pasión
ya ardiente
quema, arde
te hace llorar
como chile habanero.
Siento su humedad que escurre
entre sus piernas
su pulque
la bebida de mis antepasados
beberé como los reyes.
Me alimento de su cuerpo
me animo al oír la gruir de placer.
Es me diosa, le como, chupo
Mamo como si cometiera
Un sacrificio.
Es mi diosa
Tonantzin
Diosa azteca piel bronceada estoy para satisfacer
Se desea que la ame
Así lo hare un y otra vez porque es mi mujer

aspiración con aguja fina

agrandamiento de células malignas
es el cáncer
que me come por dentro
convirtiendo nos en enemigos,
en mi propia
mi peor enemiga.
Por que la verdad
ni quien me pare
ni quien me mantenga

si que el rechazo fractura el ego
luego uno se pasa la vida buscando
ese refuerzo positivo
fracturas se curan
no olvidar lo caminado
ese golpe no fue por torpe
tope topare con mi destino
siento el frio en las
venas aunque no tengo nada
nada pa’ perder
solo el alma que se
marchita
se marcha
de mi cuerpo
simplemente
una cavidad
simple
seré
pero seré!